The Ultimate Grace Hopper Celebration Guide: Everything You Actually Need to Know
Look, I've been to Grace Hopper multiple times. I've made mistakes, learned lessons, had panic attacks, made incredible friends over trivia, and figured out what actually matters at this conference. This is the guide I wish I'd had before my first GHC—real talk about everything from badge pickup logistics to managing anxiety to what recruiters actually want to hear.
This isn't just another "10 tips for GHC" post. This is everything. The comprehensive, no-BS guide that covers the stuff nobody tells you until you've already messed it up once.
Let's do this.
Table of Contents
Before You Even Leave Home
What to Actually Pack
The Basics: Logistics That Matter
Career Fair Strategy: How to Actually Stand Out
Sessions & Learning
Networking & Brain Dates
Social Events & After Hours
Managing Overwhelm & Taking Care of Yourself
For Returning Attendees
For My Anxiety-Riddled Friends
A Memo From Your Friends in Industry
What Really Matters
Before You Even Leave Home
The "Clean Sweep" Resume Upload
If you haven't yet, re-upload the absolute latest version of your resume to the official GHC database. Recruiters are running final searches now. I'm serious—do this right now if you haven't already. Companies will continue to search this database and reach out for weeks after GHC ends, so make sure your resume is there ASAP.
Apply Early to Everything
When should you start applying to company portals or GHC-specific links? As soon as possible. Worst case they have you reapply to a GHC specific link or listing, but often they'll look you up in their existing system if you mention you have already applied. I've only experienced this being seen as true interest and coming prepared. People want to hire prepared, proactive people who actually want to work there.
LinkedIn Prep Work
Don't just update your profile—pre-write a personalized connection message template (e.g., "Met at [Company] booth at GHC. Loved your talk on [Topic]. Let's connect!"). You'll use this a hundred times. Trust me, having this ready will save you so much time when you're exhausted on day three.
Also, make sure your LinkedIn QR code is instantly accessible. Put it on your phone's home screen or save it as a favorited screenshot. You're going to scan dozens of QR codes throughout the conference, and fumbling through menus every time gets old fast.
Business Card or QR Code Strategy
Skip the paper cards, go fully digital for speed and tracking. Ensure your digital business card or LinkedIn QR code is instantly accessible. The QR codes are critical for this being simple—you should always leave conversations having already sent a connection request on LinkedIn.
Research Your Target Companies
Know the companies you want to talk to. What are they working on? What's their culture like? What roles are they hiring for? Showing up and saying "so what does your company do?" is not going to impress anyone. The companies that interest you enough to wait in line deserve at least 10 minutes of research beforehand.
If you want to see who all currently has talent expo/career fair booths, check out my complete company list where I went booth by booth through the app.
What to Actually Pack
For Your Hotel/Trip
Business casual clothes (multiple outfits—you'll be there several days), any self care you want (tooth care, skincare, makeup, etc), chargers and cords for all electronics you are bringing (I bring my laptop, iPad, headphones for the plane and hotel room, phone, and Apple watch), pajamas, most of the usual packing.
But here's what matters specifically for GHC:
Business casual clothes (yes, I listed this twice because it's important)
COMFORTABLE shoes (this cannot be overstated—you will walk miles each day)
Layers to stay warm as Chicago is usually cold this time of year
2-5 physical resumes if you plan to hand them out (more on this later)
Portable charger (essential, not optional)
What to Bring to the Convention Center Daily
Portable charger (yes, bring it EVERY DAY)
Water bottle (I usually try to bring one that is a bit of a conversation starter—mine is from the national parks with stickers for each one I've visited. It opens up conversations all the time about where both them and I have traveled, if I'm into hiking, etc.)
Something to take notes in sessions with
Your phone with your LinkedIn QR code accessible
A quick and easy way to check your schedule (especially if you might be trying to squeeze in interviews)
The Swag Question
Swag has shifted over the years. My first year I attended GHC, I brought an extra suitcase. It was mostly full when I came home. To be honest, I don't know if it's swag becoming less common or smaller or the fact that I've moved to care about it less than I did the first year. Honestly, probably all of them.
At this point I'll only take a few things I actually want—I might leave with a handful of things. Historically GHC has had a provided bag for swag when you check in, it's been a nice canvas bag that is giant. If you want to grab swag, make sure to give yourself plenty of space to get it home.
The Basics: Logistics That Matter
Badge Pickup: How Early Should You Arrive?
There are a lot of times to be able to grab your badge, typically the line moves quickly, but I'd still recommend giving yourself an hour of time to make it through badge pickup before the first thing you want to go to. "Worst case" you get done with badge pickup early and have time to wait for your session or expo access and get to meet some people in the meantime.
What to Wear
It is business casual, make sure to still wear comfortable shoes, and layers to stay warm as Chicago is usually cold this time of year. I cannot stress the comfortable shoes enough. You will be standing in lines, walking between sessions, and on your feet more than you expect.
Navigating the Convention Center
I haven't been to this conference center previously, but based on my previous experience, I'd give 15 minutes for most things, 10 minutes for low risk things (sessions you're okay missing, etc), 20 minutes for any serious commitments (interviews, brain dates, etc). Convention centers are big, and you don't want to be that person running in late and out of breath.
Food Situation
I historically have brought some of my own snacks, but there are also typically a few spots around the conference center where you can buy food and drinks. Waiting in these lines are far from a waste of time as some referrals have come from waiting and casually chatting in the line for coffee.
People refer who they want to work with. Your pitch without being asked your background isn't what will potentially get you a referral in this setting. Being human and treating others like humans instead of machines to get YOU a job is what makes the difference in casual environments.
Check Your Email and LinkedIn Multiple Times Daily
Set aside time each day (ideally multiple times a day) to check both your email and your LinkedIn. Some companies will send follow ups rapidly throughout the event, some will still be doing reach outs straight from the resume database (many will continue to do this for a few weeks after GHC). You don't want to miss a time sensitive message.
Career Fair Strategy: How to Actually Stand Out
The Brutal Truth About Standing Out
Ultimately in a conference of 20,000+ people, it is incredibly hard to stand out. Find people of similar experience (other students, other early career, etc) on LinkedIn and ask yourself what is the difference between you two. I hate comparison, but this is one of the easier to explain ways to figure out the way to be different.
Lean into what you are, not what others aren't.
Preparing for the Talent Expo/Career Fair
Make sure your resume is up to date. Prioritize companies to talk to. Research companies. Have your elevator pitch ready. Be ready to be asked questions about your resume and perhaps a screening technical question (I've been asked time complexity of a common algorithm before, but never something that made me need or even want paper or a computer).
For help with your elevator pitch and strategic approach, check out my strategic GHC job seeker guide which includes a worksheet to help build your self-pitch.
What Recruiters Want to See on Your Resume
This very much depends on the job you want. Company to company will also vary. Have any skills called out, but also make sure to either differentiate your comfort with different things or to be able to answer a question leveraging any skill you mention.
Practically everyone wants to be in AI or ML these days, so be prepared to explain why you are qualified and have that reflected in your resume. Simply being interested is generally not a good enough explanation of why someone should hire you as an ML engineer.
Research the job titles you want, notice trends in skills, point out any you already have in your resume (note others as to-learns for yourself later).
DO NOT lie on your resume. A lot of these companies will check and if it even seems like you could be lying, they have enough candidates to reject you.
How to Actually Stand Out When Talking to Company Reps
If you know something great about yourself, find relevant ways to explain it. For instance, I know I'm great at self-managing. But how does someone "justify" that as someone early in their career?
Well, my college has a system where every 6 months we get assigned classes to complete. Other than the end of those 6 months, there are no real deadlines. It is your responsibility to keep yourself on track. Graduating from such a program is PROOF that I am organized, self-motivated, and able to self-manage.
Things like this are critical. Don't simply say "I learn quickly"—explain how you KNOW it. For me, I'm able to explain I'm a quick learner by having started getting into cybersecurity during my bachelor's degree. Within 3 months of getting into cybersecurity in my free time (it was my covid hobby when everyone had one and SO MUCH SOURDOUGH was made throughout the world), but within 3 months of starting that as a hobby, I was doing cybersecurity competitions and ranking in the top 3% of students across the country.
I didn't "just" learn, I can bring proof. If they asked me to prove it (which I would never actually expect) I can bring up my college's progress and term system or my ranking report for cybersecurity competitions.
Important note: Women especially are taught that any positive talk about themselves is "arrogant," "entitled," "rude," or all sorts of other less than great things. There is a line, but generally, when talking to company reps in the talent expo, this line is just shy of non-existent. In general, be proud of what you're good at, but it shouldn't be the only thing people know about you.
Physical Resumes: Yes or No?
I didn't attend GHC last year, but in 2023, almost no companies even accepted physical resumes. It's a logistics challenge for them to manage all of that paper, a privacy risk to not lose such a piece of paper (usually containing a lot of personal identifying information), and just annoying to go through.
I'd suggest bringing 2-5 physical copies just in case, but that should be enough. If you run out, ask the next person who asks if you can get their email and send it to them.
Recruiter vs. Engineer: Does It Matter?
When we're standing in line to talk to people from a company, is it better to talk to a recruiter or an engineer?
You don't usually get to pick if you will get to pick between talking to an engineer vs recruiter. This simply varies company to company, with most companies almost exclusively using engineers or almost exclusively using recruiters. It has never even come to mind who I'm speaking to. For the one time I helped work a virtual conference booth with Boeing (for Women Who Code's conference), everyone was thoroughly prepped for whatever conversations arose, even if an engineer.
What Kinds of Companies Attend?
A bit of everyone. It is generally expensive for a company to attend GHC, so startups are practically non-existent in the talent expo, but feel free to talk to people about their companies. Engineers at startups often are much more critical to hiring if they have roles and their company is affected more by having unfilled roles, so they'll be pretty proactive in conversations.
Once again, I cannot stress this enough: other attendees are not there to help you get a job. Do not treat them like they owe you something. They don't and it's rude and annoying.
I could write a whole post on people assuming I'd introduce them to a Boeing recruiter or get them a job at the startup I worked at. Both still happen to this day. I'm a human beyond my job title and what I can do for people. I try to be helpful, but ultimately I'm there for my experience as is everyone else. (Rant over)
Following Up After Talking to a Recruiter
Always ask to either get a photo of their badge or get their name before leaving the conversation. Respect boundaries if the answer is no. Once you leave the space (talent expo or area you had conversation), find them on LinkedIn and send a personalized request to connect. That's significantly easier than asking for email and hoping you got it down right.
When Should I Line Up for My Talent Expo Time?
I have not attended with this system in place previously, so my advice at this point is a complete guess. I'd assume 30 minutes ahead is potentially fine? I don't know how big or small access groups are either. This is new as of 2024, so we're all figuring it out together.
Maximizing Your Chances of Landing Interviews
Apply early. Refine your resume, a lot. Make it clear what you want and are qualified for. Limit to 1 page. Make sure to have your self-pitch ready and natural, but confident. Practice open, powerful body language.
People make first impressions before you even open your mouth. Be someone they notice in line for being kind, friendly, etc. Approach with confidence. Sure, give them your self-pitch, but also leave room for them to communicate any information with you. You are with 20,000+ people. Every little detail will help you stand out.
Know the company. Ask good questions that show you put forth effort. Make them leave the conversation saying "wow, I want to work with them."
How I've Actually Gotten Interviews
I've had interviews through three methods:
Submitting my resume through the resume portal and then having companies reach out to me. Many will continue to reach out after GHC ends, so make sure your resume is there ASAP even now.
Apply through company links in the portal.
Talking to companies on site and being one of the few who got interviews on the spot.
As a heads up, I "only" have one company in talks with me currently and it's a chat with a recruiter. I've previously gone to GHC with 1-4 interviews lined up and scheduled, so remember this market is different than what people have previously written about. Results being different than you've seen someone post is perfectly expected as the job market is different, so please do not feel bad about not having interviews lined up before or even after GHC.
The "Invitation-Only" Events
Companies have, for at least every year I have attended, had some invitation-only events where they email a sign up to people they are inviting. These have included everything from pancake breakfasts with pancake artists to renting out portions of Disney, to renting a piano bar and building an Amazon delivery drone inside for attendees to see.
You get invited by a company seeing your resume or profile and opting to invite you. Most of this happens before GHC starts, but they will usually have some spots for people who impress them when they talk to them at their booth. Some of these are career phase specific so don't feel bad if you aren't invited.
Sessions & Learning
Choosing Which Sessions to Attend
How do you choose which sessions to attend when there are so many?
I recommend a 50-50 split of interesting sessions to useful sessions. For useful I mean either you're learning something relevant to your niche, it is led by someone at a goal company, or is focused on the career phase you are in.
If you aren't looking for a job actively, I recommend more interesting sessions. Even if you aren't intensely looking, I don't recommend going past 70% of your sessions being "useful" as it's a direct path to burnout and quickly becoming so stressed you lose track of why GHC is great beyond potentially getting a job.
Are the Keynotes Worth Attending in Person?
Opening and closing are always worth it. In general, unless you have another session you want to attend or talent expo time you want to use, I recommend checking out the keynotes.
How Early to Line Up for Popular Sessions
This has varied SO MUCH depending on year. I'd start by recommending 30-45 minutes, but I'm completely unsure. In 2019 it was sometimes well over an hour line for popular sessions. In 2022, I had maybe 30-45 minute lines. In 2023, absolutely NO sessions had lines except opening and closing (likely due to career fair not overlapping).
Are There Specific Sessions for Students vs. Professionals?
Anyone can attend whatever (except for talent expo being scheduled times). There are ones targeted to career phase as well as particular specializations. There are A LOT of great sessions.
Networking Lounges and Meetups
Are the networking lounges or meetups actually helpful? Yes. If there are any for your area or career level, go. For career level, the few I've attended have had recruiters there to chat and invite to events (no guarantees that is at all how it will work out this year). For ones based on being from a certain location, these are so enjoyable to make friends and see what cool things people are working on in your area.
Connecting with Speakers or Panelists
How do you connect with speakers or panelists afterward? Usually they will stick around a bit after their session. If not, feel free to write them a personalized message on LinkedIn about their session ASAP. I am not speaking this year (hopefully eventually I get to🤞) but I imagine that, like me, they are regularly checking their LinkedIn and will try to connect with those who write them.
Obviously speakers only have so much time, so it's also not always possible, but even telling them you enjoyed their session would go a long way.
Meeting Other Attendees in Your Field
What's the best way to meet other attendees in my field (AI, cybersecurity, etc.)? Go to sessions on that topic. Also try making a group braindate about chatting with others in the same field. I'm confident you are far from the only person there that is in or interested in a specific specialization (I'll happily geek out over both AI and cybersecurity).
Networking & Brain Dates
What Are Brain Dates?
Brain Dates were introduced in 2023, but they are still underrated. They're a great way to more personally connect with others. What's new this year compared to past GHCs? Brain Dates, and they continue to be one of the most valuable and underutilized features.
Starting Conversations with Strangers
How do you approach someone you have never talked to (mainly recruiters) without being desperate and start talking? I don't know how to connect without having a common topic.
When in the talent expo, you should be ready to start the conversation with an intro to yourself, what you do, and what is referred to as an elevator pitch. Refer to my strategic GHC job seeker guide that includes several resources.
Outside of recruiters, you hopefully have at least one thing in common as the whole point of GHC is to connect women and non-binary folks in the tech space! If you aren't in either of those groups, you SHOULD be attending as an ally (there are a TON of other spaces for you, women make up a small percentage of this industry and ultimately, this is OUR opportunity to be the majority for once). This immediately is a connection point.
Historically people's badges/name tags have included company (if they work in industry) or college (if they are a student). People who are both students and working professionals simultaneously might have either company or school. These also open up a lot of conversation.
Don't be the person who's like "I see you work [insert company], can you get me a referral or are you hiring?" Once again, no attendee is here to get you a job except for you. Be gracious of other humans also being humans trying to enjoy their time.
For some this is their PTO. In 2023 when I was working at Boeing, I had to take unpaid leave to go to Grace Hopper. I was not only NOT working, I was actively losing money to be there beyond my normal costs of attendance. I was happy to be helpful to those that were kind and respectful of my time. I did several resume reviews (that I offered people after we chatted for a while). I did not spend time talking to anyone who felt entitled to my time as I paid a LOT to be there.
Back to happier things: most people there are cool with you asking what they work on at their company. Ask if they're in a specific niche like embedded, cybersecurity, or AI especially if you're into that niche. Also just see what are good conversation openers.
I personally pick to bring a water bottle that is of the national parks with stickers for each one I have visited. It opens up conversations all the time, basically anytime I take it anywhere, about where both them and I have traveled, if I'm into hiking, etc. There's ultimately a lot of conversation starters no matter what.
It's also okay to wait for the other person to spark a conversation. As an introvert with profound social anxiety, it can take a TON of effort for me to start a conversation. Having them doesn't take nearly as much energy.
Growing Your Network Beyond Recruiters
How can you grow your network beyond just recruiters? Talk to people. Truly, most people at GHC are not recruiters but are students or industry professionals who are happy to connect. As long as you try to get to know people while at GHC, your network will naturally grow a lot throughout GHC. You should always leave conversations having already sent a connection request on LinkedIn (the QR codes are critical for this being simple).
Social Events & After Hours
What Are After-Hours Events Like?
The vibe of these is SO company and planning team specific. For instance, I've been to 4-5 Amazon events for various teams within Amazon. One was a talk at a local fancy office building, one was a fun event at a place called IceBar where they have an inside bar made of ice within a space that is basically a giant walk-in freezer (it's a big, big space, but that's the best explanation), one was at a Tapas restaurant with trivia all about women in engineering and their accomplishments, and one was at a dueling piano bar with one of the delivery drones set up (it was for the drone team).
Very different spaces, very different events. Every single one had both free food and drinks (yes, including alcohol).
Personally, my favorite events are the calmer, quieter, lower key ones. Yes, big and flashy ones are fun, they are perfect for social media. But regardless of if you are attending for a job or just connecting with others, the smaller ones are simply better for conversations.
I made more friends at the Tapas trivia night than the others combined. I legitimately wound up with a great group of women who wound up randomly sitting at the same table, wound up therefore on the same trivia team, and we always were excited to see each other the rest of GHC. I have a TON of LinkedIn connections and to be honest, most I don't know where I met them, but I remember each and every woman from my trivia team that night. While I didn't land an Amazon job, that event gave me something that will last longer than many jobs.
Tips for After Parties and Networking Events
Remember they are ultimately networking and work events. Just because there is plenty of alcohol for free does not mean getting drunk is at all appropriate. The point is to connect with people, so also be yourself but at least talk to a few people even if you are introverted.
Affinity Group Events
Are there affinity group events (e.g., Women of Color, LGBTQ+, First GHC)? Yes, there are affinity group events! Check the app and schedule for specific events. I've also seen some group Brain Dates to fill additional gaps and create more connection opportunities.
How People Usually Spend Their Evenings
How do people usually spend their evenings during the conference? I don't know if I have ever had an evening I didn't have an event, granted the market was a lot better in 2023 when I last attended. Companies were not doing layoffs (yet). They were all still flying high. Yes, job searchers were still struggling as the market was flooded with them, but companies were feeling no financial strain or concern and it showed.
I also then spent the remainder of every evening my first GHC doing initial coding assessments, hoping one would turn into one of those magical on-site interviews and offers. (A job offer at GHC is the same as a job offer anywhere else, so don't work yourself to the point of not enjoying your time or an early grave for the sake of an interview being a few days earlier. It's not worth it.)
Unofficial Parties or Networking Dinners
Are there unofficial parties or networking dinners? Yes, everything that is not listed in the app is "unofficial." Every company event is not officially part of GHC. These are usually invite only.
Managing Overwhelm & Taking Care of Yourself
How to Avoid Feeling Overwhelmed or Burned Out
Take breaks! Take breaks! Take breaks!
Don't at all feel alone in being overwhelmed or burned out—it's quite common. I definitely took 2 GHCs to stop burning myself out. For virtual GHC in 2020, I literally ended every day laying on the floor in my home office in tears due to the burnout and overwhelm.
I get it, it all is so much and you want to make the most of it. Make time to slow down and simply exist or meet and talk to someone new. Some of the very best moments of my GHCs were times I just slowed down, sat down, and wound up starting chatting with someone who wound up sitting near me.
The quiet, real, 1:1, unplanned conversations often led me to skip a session (sometimes 2) because they were soul restoring. These moments help prevent overwhelm and burnout. Don't expect yourself to be 150% all of the time. Don't try to do everything. Don't force yourself to start a conversation with everyone.
Dealing with Crowds, Noise, or Sensory Overload
Take breaks. This cannot be overstated. I personally can sometimes get sound or light triggered migraines. I have a pair of Loop earplugs that are adjustable in how much noise they block out and those are coming with me. They're a good thing to have for both loud crowds at opening and closing, but also for quiet moments between sessions so you can find a calm spot (usually against a random wall in a hallway) and actually deal with less sound (and sensory overload in general).
If you need an accommodation, I believe GHC has a specific team to handle those and I'd suggest reaching out.
Quiet Spaces and Wellness Rooms
Are there quiet spaces or wellness rooms available? Yes, the GHC website mentions having both low volume rooms and silent rooms for any times you need substantially less sensory overload.
On-Site Support for Accessibility or Mental Health
Is there on-site support for accessibility or mental health? The GHC website mentions having the ability for staff (including those at the information desks) being able to help with accessibility help.
For Returning Attendees
Is It Still Worth Attending If I'm Not Job-Hunting?
Ultimately GHC is about the experience of being in a whole room of people who understand what it's like to be such a small percentage of the same field. It's about things like imposter syndrome being shared experiences. The people and experience is the purpose, NOT "simply" getting a job. The belief it is only for a job is what eroded the event and led to the sheer insanity that GHC 2023 was.
How to Mentor First-Time Attendees
Honestly, if you have attended before and want to help new attendees, I recommend simply talking to people, especially if they look overwhelmed. Offer whatever help you can. Host a group Braindate on your GHC advice (I'm doing this). There's a lot of ways to help the people attending GHC for the first time. It can be overwhelming for sure. Part of that improving is also being human and saying we were also once there.
Making the Most of It If You've Been Before
Enjoy whatever was your favorite part even more.
For My Anxiety-Riddled Friends
I get you. I am one myself. Lots of people think because I'm social online I don't have profound social anxiety. That couldn't be a worse reading of me. I have complex PTSD related specifically to social interactions. It's a super long story, but I grew up "profoundly emotionally abused" in the words of my psychiatrist.
My Biggest Advice
Give yourself the space you need. If you need a moment alone, find a space to do that. If you have a panic attack, most venues for conferences and such have medical rooms where they'll either sit with you in private or let you talk through the anxiety with them (I had a complete, struggling to breathe level panic attack at Rose City Comic Con last year and the EMT on site was so wonderful when I just wanted somewhere private to regain my normal breathing and wipe my tears without being asked if I was okay every few seconds).
If you take anxiety medication, don't forget to take it on GHC days—they can be hard even fully on meds that work for me.
Know You Aren't Alone
I've talked to SO many attendees with major anxiety as well. It's quite common in women in tech according to a few studies I've read. If you find me, I'm always happy to talk you through an anxiety moment. You don't have to walk it alone. You don't have to feel shame in this space. It's part of the whole point of GHC, to be fully seen.
Setting Realistic Goals
I also recommend not always doing what is hard. Set a goal for the day just enough to be barely outside of your comfort zone. For me it'll probably be start 4-5 conversations a day. That's my minimum, but I don't set it until that morning as I need to see how the ebb and flow of my anxiety is doing. From there, anything extra is a bonus but it's okay if I don't do more.
For me holding a conversation is generally easy at this point (yay years of extensive therapy working), but starting them is nerve wracking for me. For you it might be being surrounded by people, so set a goal of sitting through 1-2 sessions. If talking to people is a lot for you, have a goal for number of conversations. Don't set yourself stressful goals, but also stretch yourself just a bit.
Don't Compare Yourself to Others
I know what I'm dealing with. It can be hard to have it have taken so, so, so much effort to become who I am today where for some others, they didn't have to overcome those things. I've learned to be able to say to myself "my anxiety sucks, my CPTSD sucks, it sucks I was raised being told I was naturally unlikable, but I'm happy for those who didn't have to deal with those struggles."
I'm able to be mad at my parents for all the damage they did while being able to be glad that others got a different starting point. Thing is, I don't know their starting point. Maybe some people think I could be doing better in my career or life, maybe I have moments I'm mad it takes SO much effort for me to start conversations. The thing is, I didn't have a good starting point and people don't know, and don't need to.
Maybe the person you think you're doing worse than or seems to have more opportunities had a better starting point than you. They also could have had a worse one. Ultimately, it's okay if you have less conversations, attend less sessions, whatever than others. You are only responsible for making the most out of YOUR GHC experience. Whatever that means for you is a success.
A Memo From Your Friends in Industry
I have gotten a ton of people visiting my LinkedIn due to my posts. It's awesome to know it's all been helpful. I love hearing that everything has been helpful. It makes a lot of the time I've dedicated worth it. Ultimately, I get a TON of LinkedIn messages and most of them bring a smile to my face, but I am going to talk about the elephant in the room.
About Those Referral Requests
I have openly posted about losing my job. I have my LinkedIn updated including when I left Spice Labs and when I left Boeing. It is nothing short of infuriating when people who don't know me write me asking for a referral or me to help them get a job at either Boeing or Spice Labs.
Do not write someone only expecting them to give you something. It's rude.
If you are going to write someone, check their LinkedIn first. Asking for a referral or help landing a job at a company they aren't at anymore likely is touching on a nerve. But in general, if you couldn't spend the time checking my employment history on LinkedIn, why should I spend my time helping you? You're asking me to spend more time on you than you spent to make sure you were even being considerate of me. It's rude.
Even in person, these same things happen just in slightly different ways. Note how many times I made it clear you should be treating others as humans, not as robots there to help YOU get a job. If someone is helping you, it is them being nice.
What Really Matters
The Chair Metaphor
I was once told (at GHC) that when you get a seat at the table, you should bring a chair with you for someone else. For far too long, men have been the only ones with seats at the table in tech. I grew up in a family where I was taught that there was only one seat at any important table for anyone who isn't a guy. The thing is, there is actually room for all of us as long as we keep pulling up chairs.
These posts have been my way of trying to pull up the chairs. I want as many of you to be successful as possible. I want to not continually be the only woman at the table. I want more non-male tech leads. I want software tech fellows that are women and non-binary. I want to be one of many. When someday I retire, I hope we have made progress reclaiming our space in an industry almost completely started by women.
My Three Asks
With that, I ask that if you have leveraged the resources I've tried providing, if you've found my thoughts helpful, you do these 3 things:
1. Treat everyone at GHC as a HUMAN
Be patient with any mistakes. Remember many are feeling as much stress as you are. Treat yourself as a human. Don't expect people to do things for you, so be thankful when they do.
2. Force another chair at any table you find yourself at throughout your career
For students this might seem like it will take a long time, but there's always someone who wants to be where you are. Help them. As an upperclassman, help the newer students. As a younger student, help expand the programs to get more students, help students get into college. It's never too early to start. Make it a habit. Trust me, it's incredibly rewarding and the universe will return it all to you someday, somehow.
3. Remember the real reason of GHC
Yes, the job market is rough and every single opportunity is a lifeline. That isn't why GHC actually, at its core, exists. Take in the moments where you don't feel like you're in the 22-27% of software engineers, the 20-25% of cybersecurity engineers, or the 17-19% of data engineers who are women or non-binary.
For this one week, we get to be in rooms where we are the 90% or more. Have the conversations you don't get to have as comfortably with your male counterparts about managing periods, being a mom, societal expectations, the misperceptions about women, etc. Enjoy not having it assumed you are a manager or project manager.
This point is even more important for the men attending. This is a space where you are supposed to be here as an ally, not someone here for self-serving purposes. My reason for writing all of this and spending my time this way is not to once again make your path easier. Women have statistically less opportunities, including less mentorship. I'm here to fix THAT.
Final Thoughts
To my women and non-binary friends, I end you with this quote from a good friend: "What would you do if you were a man who had never been underestimated or ignored? Do that. Apply for that job, make that call, have that conversation."
May you have the unearned confidence of a mediocre man, especially this week.
See you at GHC. If you find me, come say hi—I promise I'm friendlier than this comprehensive guide might suggest. Connect with me on LinkedIn or follow @code_with_kate for more real talk about navigating tech careers.
